Reflections.

Time really is flying. I will never understand how sometimes, it feels like time goes by so slowly and other times a year feels like one day. One of the nice things about time is that it gives us the opportunity to learn and grow. In some cases, the growing is noticeable. A baby grows his first teeth, a bird grows feathers, and a bear grows thick fur to keep him warm in the cold winter months. In other cases, the growth is more internal. That's the kind of growing I have done over the last few months. I have learned so much by being here. Some things are difficult for me to put into words, but I will do my best.

I have said this several times throughout my program, but human interaction is so important. It may not be as important to everyone else, but for me, it is one of the most important things in life. There have been so many days while I have been here that I have just sat in my apartment and done nothing. Because I live in a one bedroom, I am home alone a lot. I don't have much opportunity for making friends at work because I am in a different location every day with different people, and once we leave for the day, we never see each other again. The people I see the most frequently are full-time, so they are in the same place every day. More commonly than not, cast members that are not on the college program do not want to be friends with college program kids. We are only "temporary," so there's no reason to waste their time getting to know us when another wave of temporary cast members will be around in a couple months. I think this is so sad. Not even for myself, but for the people that don't take the time to get to know other people from all over the world. I am so fascinated by all of the different cultures that make Disney such a diverse company to work for, that I really enjoy talking to my fellow cast members, even if I never see them again. I may work with someone for an entire day, spend the whole time talking with them, and not even get their name. If I see them again, we look at each other and say, "I think we have worked together before..." That's enough for me. If just one person remembers working with me at some point, I have done my job right. I don't mind that I see different people every day, as long as I see people. The days that I stay in my apartment all day are nice, but they are usually the most sad. Sometimes I need these days. I need to be able to sleep until noon and then lay around all day doing nothing. I need time to recuperate after working several long days in a row. But if I have two days in a row where I do this, by 3 PM on the second day, I'm ready to burst. I feel like if I don't talk to someone soon I might go crazy. That being said, on the days where I get a little bit of interaction, I feel a thousand times better. When I came back to Orlando after being home for a week, I was not doing very well. I just went through the motions each day and did as little as possible to make the time pass. This is very out of character for me, but it is the truth. I really missed my family and friends from back home and I wasn't excited to be back here where I had only a few friends. On my second or third day back, I talked to my roommate, Sarah. Just normal chit-chatting. Nothing too exciting. But the fact that she took time out of her day to talk to me made such a difference in my attitude. I felt so much better after that. We only talked for about ten minutes, but from then on, I was a lot happier. I started getting excited for work and not just going through the motions. I went out of my way to be happy instead of out of my way to be sad. I still missed my family, but I just thought about all the things I had to be excited for instead.

Most of what I have learned is about people. In my line of work, I spend 90% of my time people watching. I do not plan on having children any time soon. However, I have become very fond of children since I have started working here. Kids have such fresh minds. And they are very much a reflection of their parents. In most cases. Not every case. There's that expression, "The apple doesn't fall from from the tree." Well sometimes I sit there thinking, "I'm pretty sure it was a grapefruit that fell off that apple tree." Sometimes I really don't understand how the parents and kids can possibly be related. Then there are the times that I look at the parents and think, "Yes. I know exactly why your kid is acting that way. Thank you for the confirmation." The sweetest, most loving kids are always the ones that are torn away too quickly by their parents saying, "Come on, honey. It's the next family's turn." Of course it would happen that way. The best kids have to leave too soon because their parents are actually considerate of the fact that the people in line behind them waited just as long as them. They understand that it is more fair of them to take their turn and move on instead of lingering. But those are the kids that I enjoy having around. The ones that want to hug and play instead of push and tug.

It is important not to judge people too quickly. Everyone deserves a fair opportunity to earn an opinion. In almost any situation, two people should be able to find some kind of common ground. It may take some digging, but eventually they should find something. Taking the time to dig is important. It gives you a chance to learn something. Even if that lesson is just about accepting people for who they are. Not everyone is going to be just like you. That is what makes everyone unique.

Being physically active can make a huge difference in a person's day and life. Since I work at Disney, I walk a lot. Plus, my wardrobe for work is fairly weighted. So I am in decent shape as it is. Recently, I have started going jogging in the evenings after work. It is so nice to be able to run without being too sore to move the next day. At Animal Kingdom, there are bicycles backstage for the cast members to use because the parking lot is so far away. The best part of my day is riding the bike back to the parking lot at the end of my day. I feel so good about myself when I come back to my apartment to take a shower, knowing that I worked hard.

I do not do well with early mornings. This is not new. I've always known this. The days that I have to be up before the sun are so difficult. I just move so slowly in the morning. It is a real challenge for me. I have to be at work at 4:15 AM on Sunday. Nobody would take this shift or trade anything with me. (Shocking, I know) I have learned, the hard way, that I have to set multiple alarms when I have to work early in the morning or I will not wake up. I will sleep straight through my alarm and wake up hours later thinking, "Whoops! Guess I'm not working today." I will have to wake up at 3:00 in the morning on Sunday. I am not overly sure how well this is going to work. I might have to have some night time medicine at 6:00 PM tonight, so I can sleep before work. 

I am so excited that the next chapter of my college program has begun. I am not sad that the last semester ended. I do miss the people that have gone home. I wish they were still here, but I know it is time for all of us to move on. Everything happens for a reason. I am already starting to make some new friends. Now I just need to get a new memory card for my camera! The last one is full, but I don't want to delete the pictures!

I know there are so many more things I have learned in the last five months, but I can't think of anything else right now. I'm off again tomorrow. If the sun is shining, I might go hang out by the pool for a while since I have yet to do that at all. There is only one more week until Michael gets here. I am so excited, I might explode. Words can not express how much I am looking forward to having him here. I feel so complete when we are together. That might sound childish, but I don't care. I have always been very mature and I work at Disney. I'm allowed to say something remotely childish every now and then. 

I would like to also add that today is my mom's birthday! I'm pretty sure she's 29 or something. This is getting awkward because we are both in our 20's now. Not sure how I feel about that. Regardless, I hope her day is magical. And I hope she knows I love her very much. I could not have asked for a more loving person to be my mother. She has always done everything she could for me and goes above and beyond for everyone she cares about. I can't wait to see her on Wednesday. I'm so excited for her to come visit. She might even get to see me working!

Everyone have a magical weekend!